I can't even make this stuff up . . . .

Charley: "Grammy, why is your butt so big?"

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Charley: "Mom, I really want my own phone. A cell phone."

Danielle: "Why do you want a cell phone?"

Charley: "I want my OWN cell phone so I can call someone."

Danielle: "Who do you plan on calling?"

Charley: "My Aunt Jen . . . I sure do miss her . . . (sigh)"

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Charley: "Moooommmm, come look at the picture I drew!!!!"

Danielle: "Wow Charley, that's a great picture . . . what is it?"

Charley: "It's a jellybean. See, there are his eyes, and his nose, his mouth, his arms and legs, and there is his peanut."

Danielle: (trying to contain my laughter) "Boy, that's a good picture and I can definitely see all those parts. But let's try to leave private parts out of our pictures, okay?

Charley: (huge sigh and clearly annoyed) "Oooookkkkaaaayyy, Mom."

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Zander: (in the bathtub, mumbling to himself, as Charley plays next to him) "____ then ___ going ___ touch ____'Gina' (our word for girls parts) ."

Danielle: (entering the bathroom) "Zander, did you just say something about touching Gina's?"

Zander: "What Mom?"

Danielle: "Did I just hear you say something about touching Gina's?"

Zander: "Noooo Mom . . . we don't touch Gina's because those are PRIVATE PARTS . . . I'm only going to LOOK at Gina's."

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In the very busy movie theatre bathroom . . . . Zander: (yelling loudly) "PEW Mom!!!!! It's STINKY in here!!!! Did you just take a POOP?!?"