Deep Thoughts . . . by the Palm kids

Charley: "Hmmmm, I wonder what I am going to name my kids when I get older . . . "

Danielle: "You can name them whatever you want."

Charley: "Mom, how come you didn't want any kids?"

Danielle: "I did Charley, that's why I had the two of you."

Charley: "But if you die, you can't live in our house anymore."

Zander: "Yeah, cuz if you die, you have to go with God to heaven in the sky."

Charley: "But mom, how does God come get you if you're dead?"

Zander: "Does he use a huge ladder?"

Danielle: "No, he just comes down and gets you."

Charley: "Ohhhhh, so he floats down?"

Danielle: "Yes."

Charley: "Because he's magic?"

Danielle: "Yes."

Zander: "Yeah, and because he's really great at it."

BAD blogger!! BAD BAD BAD blogger!!

I take full responsibility for being such a slacker blogger lately . . . I'm don't have any especially new or creative excuses, other than more company, school starting, birthdays, and whatnot . . . but I will try and catch you up as efficiently as possible.

Brian's sister, Jen, arrived from Michigan the day before Zander's birthday, and she was only here for ten days, so we had to make the most of her time. Rather than ramble through the usual boring detailed descriptions of our ventures, I will just show you in pictures, in no particular order of course.

Perhaps the coolest thing we got to do when she was here was swim with some sea turtles. Now I've swam with a sea turtle or two, but never like this before, where the turtle comes within inches of you, with no fear or reservation. I heard about this secret lagoon where turtles like to hang out, so Jen and I decided to check it out. Sure enough, we saw several sea turtles, but there was one in particular, named "Miss Piggy" (according to the local diving guy) who liked to roam around wherever there were people. Of course we never touched the turtle, but we did get a chance to get close enough for some cool pictures.

The snorkeling was also beautiful there, and there were no more than a handful of other people. We will definitely be hitting our secret "Lulu Beach" (as Zander likes to call it) again in the near future.

We also managed to hit the aquarium while Jen was here, and I captured the day with some silly face action from Jen and Charley.

We also spent an afternoon at Bay Fest over at Kaneohe Marine Corps Base, where they had a carnival, concerts, and cool static displays. First we hit the rides.

Zander BEFORE:Zander AFTER: Charley BEFORE:
Charley AFTER: . . . if you look close, there are a lot of tears :(

Zander also got a chance to check out some heavy machinery.

And Charley enjoyed the ferris wheel . . .

We went out to a yummy breakfast of crepes, where Zander enjoyed his morning "coffee."

We toured around the island, hitting all the good scenic points. . . .

We went to a couple birthday parties . . .

And of course we celebrated Zander's third birthday at the Bishop Museum. The Theme: BUGS.

Our friend Aimee made this beautiful cake and cupcakes.

Which were thoroughly enjoyed . . .

Whew, so that's everything in a nutshell. Any questions? :)

I wish I had time to delve into more detail, but for the moment I don't, so I hope the pictures were enough to satiate your blog appetite.

Jen left a couple days ago, and Brian left today on a deployment to Kwajalein Atoll. So for now we are going to just relax and get back into our usual routine of school and all its happenings, hanging out with friends, and soaking in this Hawaiian life. Well, until the next burst of craziness hits anyway.

Ho-Hum . . .

Not a whole lot new to report here. So I will bore you with the details today. ;)

We are working on our second week of preschool, and so far I couldn't ask for happier kids. They both love their teachers, their classes, and their friends, and not one tear has been shed from either child since we started. Both kids go to class on Monday and Wednesday morning, and Charley also goes on Friday morning. Last week on Friday, Zander was upset that he couldn't go to school like Charley and couldn't understand that he didn't have class that day. However, as soon I reassured him that he would in fact being going back to class the next week, he was okay. Brian and I actually had a morning alone on Monday (woo hoo!), so we spent the time shopping for Zander's birthday present and perusing the bookstore. It was fabulous. Today my friend Andre talked me in to going for a run during class time, and I'm planning on making this a regular routine. Yep, I think this school thing is going to work out just fine.

Hawaii was supposed to get hit by Hurricane Felicia this week, but it turned out to be much to-do about nothing. Felicia hit some cooler water on her way here and ended up being nothing more than a minor rainstorm and a little wind, no more than we are used to. However, it did get us into hurricane-ready mode, as we are now stocked up on batteries and water, so I guess that's the good thing that came of it. We live very high up in the hills, so there is not much danger in our area other than any damage that high winds might do, but at least flooding is not an issue for us. I'm betting that we will get to experience a decent hurricane at some point while we live here, as they usually run on ten-year cycles and we are going on eleven years right now. Maybe this year will be the year.

Brian's sister, Jen, will be arriving tomorrow from Michigan for a visit, so we are all looking forward to that. The kids are crazy about their Auntie Jen, and Charley already has a list of things she wants to do with Jen while she is here. Jen, I sure hope you have a lot of energy. Other than Charley's plans, we don't have a ton of stuff specifically planned out yet, but I know the days will quickly fill themselves.

Zander's birthday is on Friday, so we will probably do something small that day, like a candle in a brownie along with some present opening . . . but we have the real excitement saved for Saturday, when Zander is having a "bug birthday" at the Bishop Museum. A very long time ago, Zander told me he wanted to have a bug birthday party this year, and it just so happens that the museum has a huge bug display right now as part of their rotating collection. So we are going to meet up with a few friends at the Museum, where we will explore the bug display for awhile, followed by a picnic of snacks and cake out on the lawn, followed by presents. Zander is VERY excited for his birthday, and is especially excited to be three. Because, you know, three is SO much older than two.

This weekend is also Bay Fest out at the Marine Corps Base here on island, so we will be hitting that up too. A couple months ago, the kids saw a mini-carnival nearby and begged me to take them. However, I knew that Bay Fest was coming up and it has a carnival too, along with other cool stuff, like static displays of tanks, helicopters, and planes, so I made them wait. And now, thanks to careful planning, Auntie Jen can participate in the carnival events too. I bet she can't wait.

Guess that's about it here. Things are quiet for the moment, but I think I'm enjoying them that way.

Taking Inventory (Part II)

As you may recall, a couple weeks ago, I wrote a post about where we are at in our lives as far as the kids go . . . the freedom that we are beginning to experience as they get older. Well, continuing along those same lines, I decided to take inventory on MYSELF, particularly since my life has drastically changed since we first arrived here on the island two years ago. Let me explain.

Take a look at this picture . . . it is a good representation of where I was at exactly two years ago when we arrived on Oahu, both realistically and metaphorically.

I sort of have a disheveled look, a smile on my face, yet you can see the obvious strain of trying to look enthusiastic while holding two unhappy babies, one in each hand. And yes, I mean babies . . . Zander was 11 months old and Charley was two and a half. My shirt is old and clearly too small, my hair is all over the place (yes, it's windy, but my hair would have still been a mess without the wind), and I'm guessing I was probably dazed from a lack of sleep behind those sunglasses since neither child was sleeping very well during the night thanks to a crazy move.

I had just spent the last two years working at a job that I absolutely LOVED, as a law clerk for a judge in Arkansas. At that time, I have to admit that I didn't feel too much guilt about taking both of my babies to daycare for almost ten hours a day, I guess because I had never really imagined a different scenario than that. I had never really considered that there were other options. I always just assumed I would be a working mom, and that's what I was. Before that, I spent nine years in college, earning three degrees and working very hard for those degrees. So, pretty much since the age of 18, I've either been in college full time, worked full time, or have gone to college while working at the same time. And that's just what I did and that's just who I was. Work, work, work, study, study, study. It's not that I never enjoyed myself or never had fun during all that (several of you can attest to that :)), but I definitely never stopped to smell the flowers, so to speak. I was on the go, go, go, and fun came in small spurts for me, as I had very little time to engage in it or figure out what things I enjoyed besides the obvious (i.e. traveling, reading, etc.). I was mostly living in the future, imagining the possibilities, but not really living in the now.

When we arrived here in Hawaii, we fully intended that I would be going back to work as soon as feasibly possible. But as the months ticked by, and after researching our various options, we both came to the conclusion that me working was just not in the cards right now (long story, but just imagine a lack of good childcare, traffic, my potential commute, Brian's crazy and unpredictable schedule, etc.). This decision was not an easy one for us to come to because it wasn't what we planned, but sometimes you have to roll with the punches, right?

I guess I just assumed that I was not well-suited to be a stay-at-home mom, not only because I've always enjoyed working, but also because patience and flexibility (both required for staying sane while staying at home) are not my strong suits. But now I was in a position where I didn't really have much of a choice. So I limped along, with a some good days and a lot of really tough days. But the longer I moved along, the easier it got, and before I knew it, I could no longer imagine being anywhere but at home with the kids.

This process has given me an opportunity to try new things and find out things about myself that I've never known before. It's given me the chance to figure out who "Danielle" is without all the academic reading, paper writing, work schedule, memorizing, researching, and busyness that consumed most or much of my time before. Here are a few things I've come up with so far . . .

1. I really enjoy crossword puzzles. I always thought I hated them because I wasn't any good at them . . . and I'm still not that great at them, I'm totally okay with cheating using Google once in awhile, but I like them. Go figure.

2. I've pretty much allowed myself to become somewhat of a moron. And right now, I'm totally okay with that. I spent so many years studying political science, keeping current on events, and studying the law that I guess I just needed a change of pace, something new to read about. So I am now an EXPERT on Hollywood news/gossip. Ask any of my friends here in Hawaii . . . I know EXACTLY what John Gosselin was doing this weekend. I know, I know, it's complete trash, but it is one of my guilty pleasures. :)

3. I actually really enjoy cooking. Again, I thought I never really enjoyed it, never showed any interest in it (despite the culinary expertise that seems to run in my family, MOM), and thought I would never be any good at it. It turns out that I just never had the TIME to enjoy it, appreciate it, experience it. I'm still no Martha Stewart, and I still hate cleaning up the mess, but I enjoy the process and have recently stocked my shelves with a whole lot of Pampered Chef products (thanks Andre).

4. I really do not enjoy shopping too much, unless I'm buying stuff for my kids. For years I enjoyed perusing malls and stores, never really able to buy a whole lot, but always liked the process. Not so much anymore . . . I guess I've become too practical. I shop more out of necessity, not so much out of want.

5. I love, love, love bookstores. I could easily spend an entire day in the bookstore, just looking at titles, reading summaries, and fingering the pages. In my previous stages of life, I was always so busy reading my assigned readings that I didn't have a lot of time to do pleasure reading. But now that I have the time, I have an insatiable appetite for reading.

6. Because of #5, I actually joined a book club last year (which is something new for me) and decided to start my own book club this year. In fact, we have our first meeting in just a couple weeks, and I'm excited and surprised by the interest others have shown in being part of the group. Yeaaaaa, can't wait!

7. I no longer feel guilty for taking "me" time. I used to feel like going to work WAS my "me" time (even though I was working), and there wasn't enough time in my off time to do things by myself or with my friends. But now that I don't have many other outlets when I'm at home, this "me" time has become essential to my sanity. And thanks to a wonderful husband who takes the kids off my hands whenever needed, and also a handful of awesome friends that are kind enough to hang out with me, I get quite a bit of time for myself, and am so much more content because of that.

8. Right now, my time is way more valuable to this family than my earning capacity. My kids seem happy and take joy in the small things, I have time to cook dinner every night and am able to keep the house somewhat clean, and I can get most errands done during the day so that our evenings and weekends with Brian can simply be spent doing fun stuff, not the errands. The kids have been healthier than they ever have been before. I have experienced all the major milestones the last couple years, and I don't feel too stretched thin anymore. It's all pretty priceless.

9. Despite my previous beliefs, I think I AM able to be a decent stay-at-home mom. Of course there is always room for improvement . . . always . . . but I like to think I've learned a lot more patience in the last couple years, I've learned to be a bit more flexible than I used to be (although I still like to plan and organize, that will never change :)), I've learned to fill our days with fun activities, learning activities, loud activities, and quiet activities, and I've learned to enjoy the small things. I've come to believe that I CAN do this and will enjoy it too.

10. Perhaps most important, I've learned that I LOVE being at home with the kids right now. It was not what I planned, it was not what I expected, but it's turned out to be one the biggest blessings I've ever experienced. It's a small window, a mere four years, and I know that it will probably not continue after we leave here, but for now I'm savoring every moment. For the first time in a long time, perhaps for the first time ever, I can say that I'm truly content and am not dreaming of somewhere else I would rather be.

If you read all that, thanks for indulging me. :)

Saying goodbye . . .

Literally and figuratively speaking.

Summer is always a mixed blessing for us Coasties (and other branches of the military for that matter) . . . sometimes it means new friends arriving, sometimes it means old friends leaving, and sometimes it means that it is our turn to move on to the next destination. This year has me agreeing with the old adage that it is easier to leave than be the one left. I know that's not always true for everyone, but this year has meant a lot of hard goodbyes for us, as we are those that are left behind.

First, the Commander of the Air Station and his family got orders for Headquarters in Washington D.C., so the Change of Command for the station occurred on July 16th. Even though this move was expected, we were all saddened by their departure, as we had all grown very close over the past couple years.

And as you already know, we also said goodbye to our good friends, the Murray family, in early June as they also headed to the D.C. area. Right after they left, we unexpectedly learned that our other great friends, the Roethler family, would also be shipping out for D.C. at the beginning of August. Yep, this was destined to be a tough summer.

Despite all the goodbyes, we also got a chance to give a warm Aloha to one of my oldest and dearest friends, Andrea, and her family. They made their first trek to Hawaii, staying with us for ten days, and we took advantage of every possible minute. We trekked all over the island, taking in the sites and trying to squeeze in some relaxation too, and I think we were successful at both. But once the ten days came to a close, I once again had to say a pretty difficult goodbye.

Last but not least, I had to say goodbye to my babies as they both headed off to their first day of preschool. Zander is officially in the 3-year-old Duck class and Charley is in the 4-year-old Dolphin class. We managed the day with no tears and no major catastrophes, and I even managed to enjoy my three hours alone without being too lonely.

I'm thinking that's enough goodbyes for awhile.